Last night I had the beginnings of what could've been a big meltdown.
It all began with me trying to do my french homework. I had to write a brief biography of a celebrity. Well that about made it, I started getting soo frustated because I couldn't write all I wanted because I just didn't know how. As I reached for my notebook, to look at my notes, to see if I found any help, I found some old notes, and exercises I had done about 9 years ago when I took french, I couldn't believe all the french I knew. Looking at that got me so aggravated, how come I couldn't remember all that?
I started to get frustated, and thinking that by the speed I am going, I will never be able to even understand one of the lectures from the chefs once I am in school. I wasn't even considering me being able to communicate back to them, all that seemed so impossible. I was about to start crying, like there was no tomorrow.
Luckly before the first tear came down (cause if I had begun,I wouldn't have stopped easy), I calmed myself down, realizing I am not even trying that hard. I mean, I do watch some french TV, but that's about all I do, I don't do much more, I don't even ask questions to the teacher. There are so many thing I knew and forgot, that I decided I am really going to make a bigger efford. I decided that small things but that are clue like the verb "to be" that I have totally forgotten are just a question away from the teacher to help me remember. I also need to do some same things that I hated as a kid learning english, but that proved very efficient, like doing written repetitions of verb conjugations, or daily reviewing some vocabulary.
Ok, I know is a bit nerdy, go ahead you can call me a geek, but I really need to learn as much as I can before I am in real need to used it. So tomorrow I will post more about my walks thru Paris, because now is about time I go do some verb tense repetitions.
Lets hope I can do some real learning now!!